You,
It's been awhile. I haven't seen you in over 5 years and that's not long enough. I really hope to never see you again. You brainwashed me. You said terrible, hurtful things to me. Funny thing is that immediately after our worlds split apart I was miserable. I acted crazy. I cried for hours on end. Why? I think about it from time to time and laugh at my young naive self. You didn't deserve 5 seconds of my time yet alone 5 years. In a few short months, the last tie I have to you will be gone and I will be elated! Not that you have a hold on me like you did long ago but I just hate hearing your name. It literally makes me nauseas. Thank you for what you did and for letting me go. I fear that if things didn't get bad enough for you to go that I would've been your little puppet forever. I've been free of your strings for a few years and it's been an incredible journey. I have no more words to waste on you.
Monday, March 19, 2012
Day 12: Your Blog Story
I've always been a fan of keeping a journal and blogging was just another outlet for me to express myself. It's so crazy to see where I was and where I am. So much has changed. I've changed. A goal I have this year is to spruce up my lil blog here and start commenting and following more blogs. I think the online community is so powerful and rewarding.
Day 11: A person you would love to meet
Hands down...Julianna Margulies.
I have been a fan of her's since E.R. and then I had to start watching "The Good Wife" when it aired a couple of years ago. I just think she'd be a kickass person to hang out with. Let's be friends Julianna! Haha...that wasn't creepy.
Day 10: Songs you listen to when you are Happy, Sad, Bored, Hyped, Mad
HAPPY: "Learn to Fly" - Foo Fighters (one of my favorite bands)
SAD: "Stay" - Sugarland (such a powerful song)
BORED: "Supermassive Black Hole" - Muse (one of my favorite songs so I can listen to it whenever)
HYPED: "Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites" - Scrillex (recently got into this music, my friend Tonya hates it but it makes me want to dance)
MAD: "Requiem for a Tower" - Clint Mansell (something about this song just empowers me and calms me) **it was in this "Lord of the Rings" movie
Day 9: Something you are proud of
This is actually something I'm struggling with at the moment. I don't have a lot of stuff I'm proud of right now. I would say work but I'm always trying to better myself there. If I truly get into healthy routines and complete some of my goals I feel like I'll be proud of something then.
Day 8: Short term goals for this month and why
My March goals are as follows:
1. Focus on my health - I have lost focus of this for over 5 years. I used to love the gym and pushing myself to my limits physically. I want to drinks more water and cut out soda. I want to make better meal and snack choices. Key for me is be prepared. Get ready the night before. Lay out my workout clothes, pack my lunch, etc. I have to get this under control. Diabetes is a killer in my family and I don't want to be another victim.
2. Continue not to dwell on the small stuff - I have a bad habit on focusing on the stuff I cannot control. This causes so much strife in my personal life and I really need to continue focusing on this.
3. Make time for family and friends - I get so wrapped up in work and being tired that I don't take a time out for my family or friends. I need to just get out and do it no excuses. Usually my weekends consist of cleaning and then resting up for the week but it's not fulfilling.
4. Do things just because - Bring breakfast to my department at work, buy someone's lunch, send a letter to friends just because. I know I love unexpected kindness and I want to spread that around.
5. Write - I've had an idea in my head for awhile for a new story. I want to dive into it. I feel like I have a good plot and some good characters already built up but I need to sit down and do it. I'll either take a notepad and go to a garden somewhere and brainstorm or hit up a B&N and take a few hours to focus on my writing.
1. Focus on my health - I have lost focus of this for over 5 years. I used to love the gym and pushing myself to my limits physically. I want to drinks more water and cut out soda. I want to make better meal and snack choices. Key for me is be prepared. Get ready the night before. Lay out my workout clothes, pack my lunch, etc. I have to get this under control. Diabetes is a killer in my family and I don't want to be another victim.
2. Continue not to dwell on the small stuff - I have a bad habit on focusing on the stuff I cannot control. This causes so much strife in my personal life and I really need to continue focusing on this.
3. Make time for family and friends - I get so wrapped up in work and being tired that I don't take a time out for my family or friends. I need to just get out and do it no excuses. Usually my weekends consist of cleaning and then resting up for the week but it's not fulfilling.
4. Do things just because - Bring breakfast to my department at work, buy someone's lunch, send a letter to friends just because. I know I love unexpected kindness and I want to spread that around.
5. Write - I've had an idea in my head for awhile for a new story. I want to dive into it. I feel like I have a good plot and some good characters already built up but I need to sit down and do it. I'll either take a notepad and go to a garden somewhere and brainstorm or hit up a B&N and take a few hours to focus on my writing.
Day 7: A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you
Not the most awesome picture of us together but it's the only one I had here at work. We took this picture in the line to get into the theatre on opening night of "Breaking Dawn". My brother and a few of his friends also went with us. It was so much fun. My mom always does everything she can for my brother and I. My mom had me at a young age so for about 5 years it was just her and I. She has taught me to be strong and independent. She's taught me to love with my whole heart. We've always been close and she is not only my mom but one of my very best friends. I'll always look up to her and to her for guidance.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)